Tips for Building Connection on a First Date
- Coach Natasha
- Jun 15, 2022
- 2 min read
Updated: Jun 29, 2023

Meeting someone new can be exciting, but it can also be a little bit nerve-wracking. One of the best ways to get to know someone is through conversation and asking questions. Asking the right questions on a first date can help you build a connection and determine if this person is someone with whom you want to pursue a relationship. Here are some tips for choosing conversation starters that will help you make the most of your first date.
Be Open and Honest
The key to building connection is creating an environment where you both feel comfortable being open and honest with each other. Choose questions that encourage your date to share their thoughts and feelings without feeling judged. Don’t ask yes or no questions—instead, ask open-ended questions that require more than just a simple answer. This will give them space to really express themselves while providing insight into who they are as a person.
Focus on Values
One of the most important things in any relationship is having shared values and interests. Ask questions that allow your date to talk about what is important to them, like what their hopes and dreams are for the future or how they spend their free time. You can also focus on topics like music, books, or movies that matter most to them, which will provide valuable insight into their values and passions.
Talk About Experiences
Getting to know someone also involves understanding their life experiences—both good and bad—and how those experiences have shaped who they are today. Ask about past relationships or jobs they have had in order to gain perspective into their life story. Talking about experiences allows both people to connect on a deeper level by sharing stories from their lives which may be very different from one another’s yet still contain common threads of understanding between them.
Asking the right kinds of questions on a first date can go a long way towards building connection with someone new while giving you invaluable insight into who they are as an individual person. Focus on topics such as values, experiences, and interests in order to get an authentic glimpse into your potential partner’s life story so that you can decide whether pursuing this relationship further makes sense for both of you. After all, communication is one of the cornerstones of any strong relationship!
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